It’s been one of those weeks. Nothing feels right. Everything around me is the same as usual, but somehow, nothing satisfies. I’m missing…something.
Could it be my family who seems miles away? Could it be my “history friends,” those I can go to and I don’t have to explain anything but they already know? Could it be a semblance of my old life, the way things used to be?
Part of what I’m feeling could be some of those things. Yet last night, as I stood worshiping with hundreds of others at our weekly gathering, I felt it.
That yearning, longing. For home. For a place I have never been before, but deep within me, my heart instinctively knows what that place is like.
It’s the Garden. The footsteps of my God in the cool of the day. The unhindered, face-to-face communion with my Creator.
As tears streamed down my face, I heard myself whisper, “God. I miss You. It’s hard sometimes to be close to You in the midst of life. God…when will that day come? The day when I can stand before You and there is nothing holding me back from pure fellowship with You?”
I confess – there are days, months even, that go by and I don’t think about the end. I don’t think about how this grand story of God climaxes to a glorious finish and how my little life can be wrapped up in this narrative.
Yet it’s weeks like these that I am thankful to be reminded of the importance of knowing the end from the beginning.
Especially in the last few weeks, where our news feeds have been filled with serious issues, it’s easy to simply scroll past the ugliness and hope that everything will pan out in the end.
But what if it doesn’t? What if there is a bigger story being played out by a Sovereign God who allows the evil of humankind and the sad events of history to shake us to our senses, that there is no human solution apart from Him?
He is not interested in our “moralistic therapeutic deism.” He’s interested in our hearts and in our living for Him every moment.
It’s in knowing the end from the beginning that we can have confidence in the why of today.
It’s in knowing the end from the beginning that we can have wisdom to know how to share this with those who have no knowledge of the Almighty God as the good Father.
It’s in knowing the end from the beginning that we can have hope, that as the world begins to reflect the words of God as noted in Scripture, we don’t have to be afraid. We know where this is going.
So today, I anchor my soul in the tension of the longing, the yearning for a home I have never seen. I know that when I keep my eyes fixed on Him, I find joy in knowing the end from the beginning.