It’s been a while.
It sounds like an excuse that we’ve all heard too many times, but yes, here I am saying it on behalf of our famiLee…it has been a really busy few months.
It was all to be expected. We knew that when my husband moved into pursuing his M.Div. full-time and serving as a young adult pastor at a local church, things would change. Routines would change, workloads would change, time spent together would change…
But sometimes you know something with your head, and you think you’re prepared for it with your heart…but you’re not.
Some time in March one of my dear college friends visited us here in Kansas City and gifted me this sweet devotional by Shauna Niequist. A few days later, I opened up to March 29th, read the title at the top of the page – Love Story – and felt like Shauna was talking about me and my current state of heart…
Confession: when I’m stressed, the to-do list becomes king…but marriage isn’t about a well-executed to-do list…along the way, I’m learning that being connected in a deep way is so much more valuable than being well-organized, efficient, buttoned-up, and tidy. I default to tidy when what my husband wants and needs more than anything is laughing, listening, and playing, being with instead of being efficient.
Marriage isn’t a business, co-owned and managed. It’s a love story. The most important things we can give our marriage are time and romance, kissing and laughing. Laundry can wait, but a love story needs to be written a little bit every day.
A love story needs to be written a little bit every day.
Sometimes we fall into the trap of thinking that love stories are mostly fire-works, fancy dates, adventurous vacations, or something ridiculous like sleeping under the stars (okay, seriously…bugs, people. Bugs. Out on the ground where you’re sleeping romantically under the stars. Yeah, no.).
But a love story is just that – a page-by-page, sentence-by-sentence story. It means snuggling together just a few minutes longer after your alarm goes off in the morning. It looks like putting down your phones and laptops and sitting on the couch with dessert, staring out your window at the cute kids playing outside on the street. It is listening…really listening, knowing that the only way to build this life together is by listening to the other and making meaning together out of the whirlwind that is life.
And just as much as I need to give my marriage time and intentional romance in the midst of being busy, the same applies between me and my Maker.
When I’m busy (which I suppose for most of us, is all the time), I feel guilty for not giving Him lots and lots of time in prayer or reading His Word. I feel like my relationship with God only has meaning when it’s all fire-works, filled with lots of revelations and prayers, journal writing for pages and pages, tissue box emptying and trash can filling, and if it’s a really good day, maybe even an inspiring, meaningful blog post. Ha!
But a love story needs to be written a little bit every day.
And so, I’m learning that the most important relationship in my life does not function on the basis of a well-executed to-do list. It’s real and He is real. This love story is being written in the moment by moment whispers of prayers said in my heart, asking to feel His presence in greater measure. It looks like setting my alarm a half hour earlier or staying up a little bit longer, just talking to Him like I would talk to my husband. It’s a daily reminder to choose to step out of the daily grind for a moment and look up, knowing that this love story needs to be written a little by little every day.