A Reflection on Our Year of Miracles // One Word for 2018

It’s ten days into 2018 and I’ve finally started to remember to write 2018 instead of 2017.  Which means 2018 must be here to stay, right? 🙂

We kicked off the New Year with a sick baby – full blown coughing, sneezing, snot drizzled everywhere, low-grade fever, no sleep…oh the joys of parenthood.

And just as the kiddo started to get better…the husband got sick.  And then just as he started to get better…yup, you guessed it…I got sick.

Which is why this is being written ten days into 2018, instead of on the 1st of January.

I digress.

A couple of years ago I learned about One Word 365 from my sweet blogger friend Sarah.  And heading into 2016, I just knew with a strange certainty that the word for that year would be “Immanuel” – God With Us.

At the time, I had no idea that my first-born son would be born in 2016, 10.5 weeks early.  There was no way to anticipate the up and down journey it would all be, and that my one word – Immanuel – would become such an anchor for us in that season.

Heading into 2017, I felt such conviction that it would be a year of miracles.  We had just witnessed our little 29 weeker thrive in the NICU, surprise the doctors despite all of his medical diagnoses, and come home before his expected due date.

But there I was, the last day of 2017, permanently situated on my glider as I tried to rock a very cranky, sniffly little boy to sleep. Read more…

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Waiting

Abba Father…

Here I am, again.  I look around and feel an overwhelming sense of déjà vu.  Haven’t I been here before?  Haven’t I spent enough nights, tossing questions and doubts through the caverns of my mind?  I thought I had done my time on this island, looking out at the vastness of the unknown.  Sure, the circumstances are different, but the whirlwind of emotions feel oh-so-familiar.

Yet, here I am.  Again.  Waiting.

As I sit here with my candid thoughts and fervent emotions spilling forth from within, You’re reminding me so gently of this – but, dear one, we have a history together.

And then I remember.  How those many quiet moments of desperation led me back into Your presence.  How stubbornness got the best of me and brought me low, lower and deeper into raw conversation with You.

The fog begins to clear and I can see glimpses of truth.

How waiting turns into relationship when my fears are melted in the vastness of Your love.  How waiting turns into joy when I experience the breaking in of Your light onto my darkened soul.  How waiting seasons my heart, refining my character and burning away the too many unnecessary things.

See, there’s a history of waiting between You and me.

And so, I declare what I know to be impossible to say by my own strength.  I will remember You.  I will sing of Your great love and mercy.  I will declare Your faithfulness, goodness, and kindness to me, one so undeserving.

So I wait…with hope and expectation.

Because You are Immanuel God.  And that’s all I need to remember.

Amen.

 

One Word for 2016

I’ve been pondering on my resolutions / goals / hopes / dreams / (whatever you call it) for 2016 for a while now.

Towards the latter half of 2015, I wrestled with the reality of “letting my ‘yes’ be ‘yes,’ and my ‘no’ be ‘no’” in my own personal life, thinking about the importance of speaking the truth in every possible way on a daily basis.  I am all for making goals, lists, plans of actions, etc.  But there is something sacred about committing to one thing, even a small thing, and carrying out that commitment with grace.

I was reading my friend’s blog today (she writes with such honesty, grace, and beauty…you need to read it for yourself) when I ran across the concept of One Word 365 (or I suppose it’s 366 this year since it’s a leap year!).

It is utterly brilliant.  Instead of having all of these resolutions, you pick one word that sums up your various goals, dreams, and hopes for the year, and you live with that one word in mind every day.

The funny thing is, I had already had one word floating through my thoughts and popping into my head at random times throughout the last couple of months.  I suppose this is best evidenced in my last blog post.

So here it is, 2016… Read more…