Choosing to Speak in Love // A Reflection on Year Three of Marriage

December 20th marks our anniversary.  It’s been three years since we said our vows to one another, deciding that for better or for worse, this would be our forever person.

When I look back at our wedding video and read the post I wrote for our first anniversary, I remember how absolutely, overwhelmingly in love I was with my husband.

And I still am.

But although that love I felt then was real and true, it hadn’t yet gone through the fire.  It had yet to be tested and tried and proven true.

It was only a matter of time. Read more…

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Writing a Little Bit of Love Story Everyday

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It’s been a while.

It sounds like an excuse that we’ve all heard too many times, but yes, here I am saying it on behalf of our famiLee…it has been a really busy few months.

It was all to be expected.  We knew that when my husband moved into pursuing his M.Div. full-time and serving as a young adult pastor at a local church, things would change.  Routines would change, workloads would change, time spent together would change…

But sometimes you know something with your head, and you think you’re prepared for it with your heart…but you’re not.

Some time in March one of my dear college friends visited us here in Kansas City and gifted me this sweet devotional by Shauna Niequist.  A few days later, I opened up to March 29th, read the title at the top of the page – Love Story – and felt like Shauna was talking about me and my current state of heart…

Confession: when I’m stressed, the to-do list becomes king…but marriage isn’t about a well-executed to-do list…along the way, I’m learning that being connected in a deep way is so much more valuable than being well-organized, efficient, buttoned-up, and tidy.  I default to tidy when what my husband wants and needs more than anything is laughing, listening, and playing, being with instead of being efficient.  

Marriage isn’t a business, co-owned and managed.  It’s a love story.  The most important things we can give our marriage are time and romance, kissing and laughing.  Laundry can wait, but a love story needs to be written a little bit every day.

A love story needs to be written a little bit every day. Read more…

Learning How to Love // Reflections on Our First Year of Marriage

There’s a reason why marriage is meant to last for a lifetime.  I’m fully convinced it takes that long to learn how to love someone well and experience all the richness there is to being loved by another.

In a couple of days, it will be our first anniversary…finally and already, with all the emotions of both woven into our ordinary lives.

What we’ve learned this first year isn’t necessarily ground-breaking.  We also can’t claim that we always do it well or that we’ve figured it all out.  What we’ve learned is actually already pretty famous and summed up best somewhere else.  But there’s a reason why it’s called the truth.  And it’s made for an extraordinary journey.

So, what is it that we have learned this first year?  Well… Read more…

“You Had Me At a Cup of Honey Lemon Tea…” // The Story of How We Met & Fell in Love {Part Three}

For my friends who haven’t read part one and/or part two of the story of how we met and fell in love, click on the links to get caught up on the story.  The rest of this post won’t make as much sense without the context, and for me, what’s coming up next in this post is the most important part of the story.

I was originally going to leave it with just part one and part two (got what I did there?  Yup, go and read it if you haven’t 😉 ), because in essence, that’s where the narrative part of the story “ends” (I mean, our stories never end, but you get what I’m saying).

But it didn’t feel fair to end it there.  Because see, there was a lot of heart messiness and thought processing that went on behind the warm, fluttery feeling within my stomach whenever I saw “cute guy.”  There was a lot that happened in my walk with the Lord before “cute guy” even showed up on my radar.  And if I thought I was “done” in this process of growing and wrestling with the hard stuff of my heart because my status had changed from “single” to “married,” boy was I wrong about that, too.

I want to share with you some of the honest, not so social media picture perfect parts of this journey and what I’ve learned from it.  At the same time, I’m also acknowledging that by no means is everyone’s story the same.  I remember watching my friends fall in love, reading other people’s love stories on their blogs, and flipping through article after article about “how to wait for the one” when I was single.  But in a lot of ways, my story unfolded unlike anyone else’s that I could compare it to.  So I say this to tell you that I don’t have all the answers.  I don’t always know what I’m doing.  But this is what I’ve learned and if anything, I pray that it will somehow encourage you and shed light on your own journey, wherever you may be. Read more…